You are my only wish beloved
in darkness I see you
In light I see you
in my anguish
in my ecstasy
in the company of others
in my aloneness
I am with you
always you

All those old Saints and
Heroes
They are the chorus of my sorrows

Wish I could see them in dreams
Virgil and Aeneid
Homer and Ullyses
Achilles and Thetis

Watching me
Hoping
Wincing at my pain
Hearts soaring with my joys
(I would like to meet you in the garden
Augustine)

Sit with Socrates and Plato
And then away with my rowdy friends
Chaucer and company,
take pilgrimage
just for the food and drink
and tales of debauchery


Books mean nothing you say
empty peices of paper for degrees
who says I'm smart anyway?
the academy plays there games
Handing out B+'s and A's

But you my love
(you know how to enter my soul
you can read those books too
and understand the French philosphers with
your mountain lion mind

know matter what anyone says or
no matter what you think or do

(time knows that you are
mine)

Yes...you recognize yourself here
(my love)
And you should write yourself into history

My love is my poetry
and my fire and my fear
 and all my dark power/
light power

The ancient ones speak through me
and the future gods
and the prophets of know

(and they have chosen you to listen
to feel
to taste
to imbibe inside of
every part of you)

This vibrant sorcery
(our spirits belong to each other)

I didn't realize how deep you moved inside me
or how much it can hurt to be alive

Didn't realize how much it'd flip me upside down
(and I can't see which way to turn now
and I'm pirouetting into stillness now
slow pirouetting downward into stillness)

Perfect motion of destruction carries me
with frightening perfection into the
sloping wilderness

Didn't think it could hurt
this bad
almost everything is broken
inside me

True Zen-Warrior
he won't even help us
we have nothing to interest him
burdened with our possessions
(people strung around us like a christmas
garland)

It's the delicious emptiness
(fragrance of freedom
that may make him pause
for a cup of tea
at the side of
some dirty road)

it was the sing-song voice of a
child
that saved St. Augustine

"take and read, take and read"
are the words he heard
while weeping profusely
in the garden of his conversion
(profusely in the garden)

The only possibility is that
God spoke through the child
who opened a window
letting angelic guidance pour forth

Message:
find a garden
listen for the child

Specters of Aloneness
easy to avoid with a pretty tongue

Halfway round the world by now
she gave me the flight number

But I ain't no Bob Dylan
(just piece together any old story
and change the names and mix up the
faces)

But everyone knows all them
songs were about
(ourselves)

...and I know I've sinned
time and time again
turned away from the sun

held my heart in darkness
and I believe in my angel

( I picked her
because I knew she would never turn away
even when afraid )

Brighter than any darkness
sweeter than any honey
softer than the hot air of summer

The sound of her tongue
resonates in my soul
I will never lose her
fate can't be that cruel

I must have done at least
enough good in this world
to finally deserve
the sweet heaven of her
(I have felt the embrace of
my perfect love)

I don't care what people think
but I do care what I think

I'm not a good liar
ain't too good at hidin' the way I feel
and the way I feel about you is way to big to
hide

can't shove it under the rug,
it's way too hot for the back burner

(I ain't never been good at bein pushed aside
asked to hide)

I'd like to share our light with the world
not be ashamed

And you can't ask me to change it or mute it
or tone it down or stop the magnetic
mystic pull between us

You can't fake somethin this strong
so why try to water it down?

I am just a song in the sky
and the sky is a dream
and the dream exists between the
love of angels and those angels
are a God and Goddess
(both of war
both of love
both of kindness )

Gods of pettiness Gods
of Deceit

(we inherited these deities
and we are the flawed avatars
of their procreation)

and in that space in the sky that I am
you are my only sky
my only dream
my one angel
one vision
one truth
one love

trust my own darkness
i am a small candle
enough light to form a star

what magic did we steal together
(beautiful haunting
what a beautiful haunting we believed)

Showed each other a paradise
that only we could see
yes only we could see

(Borrowed St. Augustine
yeah we borrowed old good St. Augustine)


rite to the third heaven you and me
rite the the third heaven

tears and angels wings
of joy and angels wings

sorrow backwards
if this poem was
really the first
not the last line

we parted
in the beggining
we came closer and closer
after what we thought was the end

because our spirits are infinite
a whole ocean waiting
underneath what was just a taste
of what seemed like pure ecstacy

Would have liked to be there
with Eliot's Magi
in particular, the narrator
as he sat there
faded visions of the sacred
birth
and the hard journey still bearing on his
soul,
and the emptiness that his kingdom brought
upon returning

I should have liked to know
what death
he spoke of

The Pain-Life vs. The Joy-Life
We try to choose the easy one
Manichean Dichotomies
St. Augustine's Battle


After his conversion
I wonder how many long nights
he lay awake
longing for his lover

Walking the Smoky
garbage-strewn-ragged-wild-dog
streets at night
Haunting myself with Morrison Poems

Sometimes I wished I had the nerve
to give up all
my belongings
and join the beggars

(but I knew I couldn't let go of my
first class western mind)

Anyway it was just a middle-class kids
dream of escape

and then there was the man that I saw
convulsing under blankets, by the side
of the road,
flies eating his flesh

I never saw someone so close to the brink of
death, and still hanging on


I think I gave him 70 rupees
just laid it there in the dirt next to his body

Later, when he was sitting up and smoking I could
see that his eyes were all burned away,
just white cloudy pools

I've been back here for years now
and sitting in the dark
in my cozy blankets

I am jealous of his freedom

Whatever love I once had
I give to you

keep it for me please
while I remain
simply a shadow

Alone with the empty spaces
of gods I've known

Even the Buddhas leave you
finally offering a chance

(for the little light to shine)

We are the mystic ones
homeless
penniless stargazers

without the moon to shine
my words fall hollow

frail
broken

sailing without direction

(when i failed you
i failed myself)

WINTER SOLSTICE STORY 4 A PERFECT ANGEL

Once~There was an old nailed shut
rusted hinge,
dusted over secret
entrance (t0 a long lost secret place)

And a perfect angel,
who was exploring the world
and whishing for a moment
of solace &
a place to keep warm

Somehow found that dusty, rusty
old secret door,
and let herself into a golden palace

A golden palace that the builder/owner of the
palace had forgotten that he built
forgotten that he owned

and she danced there and she laughed there
and she flew there
but after a while she became lonely
with no one there to keep her company

and in her lonliness she shed angel tears
and those tears grew wings of their own
and went to the sleeping prince
who had been sleeping for years
and they flapped their wings in his face to wake him

So he came down the long staircase
to comfort the weeping angel,
and the moment she looked into his
eyes
and he into hers
neither was ever lonely again

and they lived.....
Joyously ever after : )

When will you realize that
there is nothing more to realize
and that there are no bars and cages and boxes
only the illusions of bars and cages and boxes
and they end like a movie on tv that's over when
you change the channel

...and that walking out of the cage in your mind and walking
into the bright sunlight of my door that has always been wide open
for you and will always be wide open for you (in fact my door is not even
on the hinges for you, its actually been taken out into the forest and burned
in pagan rituals to the Goddess for you)

ANGELS & ALL MY OTHER FRIENDS

...and at that very moment,
when I reached for the angels
you reached towards me

Do I need any more signs?
has not the moon, and the stars
and the avatars and the angels
given me a thousand signs in my life
to show me that all is friend,

the water and the trees and the cars and the garbage
and the homeless vagabond-thieves and the writers of
bad novels and the fat-americans and their screaming children
and the endless procession of simulacra sent in a trillion digital codes
to invade every crevice of my brains synapses

...and all of these and more...
the tram to Roosevelt Island
the broken Rickshaw drivers of Pune (in their dirty brown pants and dirty flipflops)
and the boy selling candy and ciggarettes who speaks no English
and the Elelphant who shits on the sidewalk
and the relentless beggars with their performing dogs
& painted faces

and the girls from Paris who
come to my hotel room
and the ape galloping buy me with stolen papaya
and the sun bleaching my clothes
(and the way my mind empties into sunlight until their
is nothing left to do
but sit like a dog in afternoon heat,
in the middle of the
road, )

There was a moment yesterday
when I reached out to the angels
asking them to help us be together
(and now I will continue to reach for these
beautiful angels, who are better than the best
friends and love me more than the closest family)

and you are my everything,
yes, it's not supposed to be spoken about
and we must "love ourselves" but when i love you
I learn how to love and

My spirit flies to the place of higher truth
(like when I read about Socrates and the great
dialogues he had with his friends, & don't be a fool and
not recognize that they loved their conversations so much
because they loved each other,
they were in love with each others bodies and minds
and the divine they saw in their friends eyes)

and they were thinkers...
politicians don't think,
intellectuals don't think, properly
you must be educated and wise
and most importantly IN LOVE
to think clearly

Sometimes I understand
how their is nothing between our spirits
no concepts, constructs, ideas

Our spirits touching is us
(and that time
we allowed ourselves 2
mix, like steamclouds
inside of each other)

All things shine 4 me
The disappearing begins

Like the Mystics Hafiz &
Kabir

Dipping My pen into
the well

Black ink becomes
Every color

Time fades all things
into beauty
(but we don't need that
do we)

extra-sensory-reality of our
euphoria...
(this is the kinetic dynamism of my
poetry...
& I like to leave my poems open ended,
dangerous
and free...

morning radio silence
dreaming mindspace quiet

My truth is so fragile
(so strong it won't die)

Is this what the power is for
simply to turn away

Madness besieges one from
all sides

The sage smiles
these are the truths he must battle

with no weapons no arms
at all

faithless son of dogs
(must grow wings
without the DNA)

if all my poems were backwards
and I met you at the wrong time
could I just reverse everything to make it right?

can we undo the knots that keep us apart
or do we do what Alexander did with his
Gordian quandary

How can you stand there and tell me your
truth and do nothing about it

I have nowhere left to leave to
bombs ripped apart my favorite galactic hideout

This time I will face what you face

­­

broken images
glued together
(patchwork of selves)

Pause: Smile : )
this is yourself
(break the chain of causation
addiction of patterns:
perpetual trap of creating stories
of who we are.

self imposed narratives
(if only you and I would stop this
and fly together)

Do you want to fly with me?
what's holding you back....

an empty lifetime?
bodies you think can't go on without "you"
but who are you if you deny
what you are the most

It's this place
in the river where we
meet, inside and outside
time
(flowing through now and beyond and into
our bodies and out of the skies of our souls)

its the blending of our
light that makes heaven come
alive

it's the touching of our skin
that takes bliss
into the smoke of our
lives

if we could see where my poetry
came from
(that would mean something)

Inversion duplicates itself.
done with simulation.
nothing left to destroy.

Everything is outside the
text

If she really came to me
(or did she already do that)
did I refuse what I couldn't have
or turn away what I was afraid of

She is the nucleus of
every thought
(unequivocal center)

all matter, schema, rubrics
assimilate themselves to our
synergistic dynamism

Perfect centrifuge
around which our worlds
evolve

(absolute calm at the eye of
our existence
divine peace
bliss)

Words of Page
and this is the

Page of my truth
and this is the

Page of my freedom
Page of my love

Back in the blood
of my existence
dull ache of phantoms
passing through
me

scatter out the flock
of empty desires

peaceful gray flame
(heart extinguished)
buddha ashes

mix with goddess tears
stay unholy
god has no blood
only woman

We live in a world that wants us
to lie
(agreements and contracts begging to be broken)

A free man signs no note
needs no one to hear his vows

When the masses decieve the one who tells the
truth is
criminalized

I keep saying the same
things to you
(what else is there to express)

It feels good to need it to want it
to share it to be overflowing with it
to wince from the pain of it turning in

expansion and contraction
magnetic attraction and repulsion

am I softer or smarter
or lost and easier than ever

(and some trick of my brain, or the
warm dim lights of this room
remind me once again
that you are like no other
and that you fit into my soul
perfectly)

Snapshots of a forgotten life
all that's left of the frayed scrap book
laying there just to haunt


and this aliveness of what we are now
(you haunt all my waking moments)
Is that good for you to be a haunter of my life
some kind of marvelous sun simultaneously
imploding/exploding inside of me

setting fire to all I know
(& me running around trying to put out flames
half halfheartedly)

The Mountain lion knows
when to return for us
(she cast her spell that day)

and merely waits for the moment
between time to perform
her shamanic magic

We are the WildCards
in each others lives
(chance for a quantum leap)

The leap we Really-Truly-WANT
to take
so afraid of dying
(dying to the falsity of all we know)

...and being born into the truth
the truth we've always known
the freedom we've always been

(freedom of children)

Take my hand (I won't let you fall)
jump off the cliff with me
I promise
We'll grow
Wings

My wild tiger
we are a dream
that will never go away

(we are light waves)
come to the wild places
of my heart
(unexplored wilderness)
run with me

Outside of time
(and the system of order
we inherited)

our souls have blended
(we flow together perfectly)

Ah Rosa,
if only we could all do so
much with our lives

with such elegant gestures of
sweet refusal

I heard you say that
you were just tired that day

Gypsy dreamer came tumblin' into
her sacred circle

(she was too-good-to-be-true beautiful
--better than an angel in a crusader's
vision)

all our answers
belong to the wrong
questions

(easier to be afraid)

love is something we talk about

Who did we come here to be
Why isn't it ever enough
when did we go wrong

(Shoot it till its right
run it over till its gone
make it fast enough to die)

Show me a fire hot enough
to burn for real
these flames don't even touch me

everyone's afraid to really
shine

creeping through cobwebs
(fear of the unnatural)
mystification of the goddess incarnation

Got a gun loaded with dreams
for a mind

Got a soul full a holes for the rain
and the sunshine

Got a motor to ride down the highway
(straight through this hell)

Got a rusty heart full a diamonds
just for you

REMEMBER

How our spirits...

and the taste of our...

and if you let me I will heal you
(bare your wounds to me)
and if you will forgive me my shadows
(flashes of darkness)...


I swear I will take your pain if I can
let my body endure it
(let my heart burst from it)

I have been fragile
I have been broken
(but I never BREAK)

Solid as a perfect train
on rickety tracks


You may wish for me to leave
(but I will not leave you)
Flawed as I am
I am your friend

(perfect as the light is, that I never show)
you know the secret way to my heart
(because you are that way)

And I saw her clothed in moonlight
(fairer than a goddess)
with her avatar sister

Rumi understood
how to disappear into love
(dissolving)

disintegrating and reintegrating
(whatever I've wanted in this
world I've gotten)

You must understand
what it means to desire
so strongly it changes
all things

Since I've let everything go already
(a golden being cut through the doggleganger
of myself somewhere in a strange Asian
dystopia, with a sword brighter than the sun)

Since all that is gone
(and there is nothing left to fear)
I can hold onto you if I want to

(let your soul slide next to mine)
I will be your home

Listen to the hobo-shaman
he knows about love
knows about rain

(knows about the road and
loneliness)

Been all kinda places
over stars and oceans

the ragged and the torn
the diamonds and the gold
put the shine right into ya
knock the fool right outta ya

Anyone could follow him (but
no one will)

The wild times
(destined to survive
past alive and so high
we didn't know how to die)

I lift my mug to every smash and blow
to the wrecks and blood and oil

(we burned it all)
the smoke and fire
(starin' down the devil)

I musta been a good dancer
to dodge all them bullets

don't believe in cash don't
believe in death don't believe
in government don't believe
in contracts don't
believe in bombs
don't believe in progress
don't believe in
insurance, don't believe in
security
don't believe in Liberals



(sometimes I like country music)
I like drinkin too much caffiene
I like rock n roll on the radio
and an engines roar between my legs
and I like my aloneness with my gods
and I could let go of everything in this world
I could let go of my life and my mind and my ego
and a comet could come and blow this whole thing away
(and for me that would be okay)

but I'll never let go of you

Am I a good enough author
to write you into my life
(or am i trying vainly to write you out of
a script that was always yours)

(the sub-continent years are a sub-textual, semi conscious
layer of me now...
projections and mirror images
collapse back into themselves
wrought with simulacra
we ravage whatever point of contact
dies between us)

Remember the shotgun weddings and
happy endings?
The gilded gloss
The spines rot out of classics somewhere in the
haunted library
of my empty ancestors

(sell the silver
sell the gold
Empty the
Tome)

Not sure what I've become
(was this the intention of my cave-ancestors)
To rise up into a techno simulation of a
simulation

Life shoots through me
(x-rays blow our bones away)
solar winds erode us into atoms

(and our sweetness blends)
here, beyond the end, together
easy to love so perfectly

(heavenly form of angelic
vibrancy
carresing earth so
lighly)

I'm not sure why god
made something better than all
poems

More delicious than all cake
(hotter than any hot rod)
more motorcycle than
all motorcycles

something that shines above all else in my life
better than rain
brighter than sunshine

She wants to know why we are outlaws
(ain't everything under the sun free & on its
own)
and their ain't no law
or bible
or church
or gun
that can pin my soul down

(and I'm wild like an animal and I ain't
never listened to no one)

(but I am gentle with her and
she can tell me things and I listen)

Cause it don't make me not free to
stay with this angel

(sorta makes me fly and gain the power of
all things)

All my friends shine like the sun

(and they sound like records from the 70’s)

And they ride like outlaws

(and they sing like angels)

And they love like pagans

(and they pray like rockstars)

And they fly like eagles

And they punch like sailors

(and they rob like jesse james)

And they give everything away

And they smile like cathedrals

And they burn all their books

And they fall down like poems

And they rise up like spring-time

I wish you knew about
(the magic that I know)

It's not because she is beautiful
(and she is more beautiful than summer)

Or that her mind is a river of wishes come true
(because she sparkles like stars reflected in night water)

She could tell you about how her soul sings up into
the spheres
(but you wouldn't be able to listen)

And how her wings spread just like an angels
(but you wouldn't be able to see them)

And every word that comes out of her mouth caresses
my soul like honey
(but you wouldn't be able to feel them)

No one notices the gods anymore

Time has converged on the
moment of our togetherness

(Existence cannot stop us)
We were created to
unite within the magic of
our infinite love

unlocking all the old places
that rusted my heart closed
empty rooms nailed shut
(good friends that died
& took a piece of me with them)

Pain turned to stone
(you are melting me into water my love
oiling the rust on the chains that bind
my warmth)

Healing the broken
spaces

I found out how
to enter the nothingness
alone in the mountains
(lost in Asia)

Now,
when I turn inside
I find you there
(my love)

& what about this paradise we
create every time we touch
every time we breath in the fragrance of
each others souls

(and I was communicating with you in
spirit all summer long...
and I rode with you and I slept with you
in my dreams...)

and I spoke with my totem animals
for you
(and she came...that fierce proud creature
gently crossed my path (to let us know)
before retreating back into her
magic solitude)

and everything is magic about you my
love
every glance
every breath
every heartbeat

I want your heart to beat with mine

Thank you...
My Divine Love
For stepping inside
the cirlcle
that seperates us

...and this is why we are alive
every cell in my body shimmers,
shines, electrifies

I float 2 inches off the ground when
you approach me

(better than a dream
finer than fine
no one has ever been
so deep inside my soul)

Come home to me and
stay home with me
I will heal your
heart

...and what did you say we are living for?
I didn't come here to be enlightened
I came here to be alive

No one "needs" be be in love
(but we HAVE to be in love)
otherwise...why are we here

Let the buddhas be buddhas
I want to be a Man
let the saints be saints
and petrify

I wanna show you how high on
our souls and bodies and minds we can be
(I'll caress you into all my poetry)

I didn't come here to die or Hide

I came here to ride
(u gonna ride with me tonight)
Woman

Words fail
she takes my spirit beyond
my own knowledge

She is like everyone/everything
I've ever loved...
and she is so much more than this

And the slightest poem of her slightest movement
is what all the masters dreamed of and failed
to achieve

I'd give you every museum in the world for a look in her eyes
(every book in the world to embrace my beloved)
Poems fall at her feet and disappear

The buddhas turned away from themselves
because they did not know one such as her
they had to escape into nirvana,
enlightenment

I have no such
quandary

You might only see your
true love once
(or not at all)

But if you do
fore even one moment
you should let her know
with at least a glance

that you have lived,
only to find her

Now I know
Where you come from
(my perfect heaven)
Your electricity
came into me

(I pray for
whatever you pray
for)

I like you better than Basho
Better than Rumi

(the poems you write inside me
are things that god has never
dreamed)

...when we go flying
(every time we touch)...

You could say that i dreamed her
(but that would be a lie)
I created her cell by cell
(finer than a biologist-surgeon-sculpture or
god)

Once again entering the places where angels
and gods must stop
she reaches inside my heart

The world needs a shotgun blast to the face
(still they wouldn't listen)
No one hears his own spirit...

We don't even live for the body
or the mind
just one little part of the ego drives everything

Some kind of bizzare status in a dead hierarchy
of rotten imagery

so...we waited these lifetimes
and became who we are
(and still so wild and free)
grew strong on starlight and
spirit vibes
(I love that you love
what I am and that you can breathe the fire
i create when I touch you)


let me whisper these things
to you

When I see what you see like in
my spirit
and I taste what you taste like in my
body
and I fly like you fly in the sky that is beyond all of
these things
(it is at these times my beloved
and only these times that I am always with you
in all moments)
and these moments spread from the center of what we
are into every moment
and I am you and you
are everything I am do
taste touch
see
be

I've heard that
the Chinese believe
there is a red string
attached between
the hearts
of true lovers

All I know is
that it is better for a poet
to have a true love
(it makes him write more,
love poems at least)

Although pain poems
sometimes make for better readings
(love poems flow from the heart
much
easier)

All my poems are about her

...& this space goes on inside of us
(flowing-light ocean of soft-passion-tide)

we have our own constellations and planetary influences
& a moon that draws our vibrations in and out
with the ebb and flow of its magnetic caresses

(we are sacred moths circling the fire of us)

My love slips into
my time
(like the nighttime slips into the sky)
slides against my body,
a warm snake slithering closer)

Flesh warmed by flesh
heat wherever our skin touches

every cell in my body vibrates
(so powerful it makes me marvel at what it is
to be human
what these bodies are
and polarities?
Why are we divided into men and women
night and day)

..so that my love can come
to me

Even though I know
that every light in the sky is
a reflection of what is already in
your soul when we become
the same space

(and in that space is every leaf on the autumn trees
all across these mountains

and all the water that moves back and forth in the oceans)

I am bigger than these things
and you are everything inside of me

4 Dylan & The Walrus

Remember our 20th century prophets
(the ones we lost, the ones we saved)
the ones we consumed like holy communion
drank the wine of their creation

(we listened to the records, consumed the spirits
tripped our trips
smoked with the gods...
became shamanistic avatars)

...I was with my beloved last night
and I didn't have to ask her if she remembers
because the music made us who we are
(I know who she was back then)

Wild & free in the 70's
we knew where we came from
(records spin somewhere in history,
spinning while the earth is spinning)

recorded discs from metallic reels
(and she is my love and she remembers,
even the way I touch her is shaped by the music)

..and they took our prophets legacies from us
cemented the dream with a bullet or two

Yet we are the dream...
Yes I have a dream too,
Yes we are the dream
Yes I have imagined

This is what you have imagined,
despite the wars and the tears we
are here, we love our women
we make our music
we write your poems

and so these tears of joy
go straight to that place
you created from truth
all those years ago...

we lift our cups
we open our hearts to the stars
(we embrace our loves)
carrying the torch of the dream

One spark so bright,
cannot be extinguished easily

We have transformed ourselves into new machines
that will go beyond the light years that separate
us from the distant gods

(and still the disc is spinning,
analog beauty without compare)
we are there,
one simple truth,
a hundred different ways

That lonely thing that don't cost nobody a
dime
(we seem so afraid to admit that it really is...
could it be that simple?
don't we need to complicate
and hate...)

How could a little song
have all the answers
(when everything is so wrong)

& We spent our whole lives knowing
and forgetting that...
all ya need is (one little thing)...
love

Whatever it is that I put into
my poems
(I steal from things I glean inside of
the places we move in)

I steal it from your silence and the cosmic
disturbances that rupture along my
energetic pathways

(in other words there is thunder and lightning
also...and golden light that cannot be
disturbed)

You already know me
(time can never take you away
from me)

We are together in infinite
places

whenever she finds me in
her mind/vibes
i am already immersed in her

if i was always now
we would live in the golden light
we already know

only she knows my real poems
and the truest of these
(she has yet to see)

we gonna ride
(lost in this life)
no time to say goodbye
before the end of time in its briefness

we kiss in the moment penultimate to
Armageddon

The rockets are all aimed at the freedom we wish to be
(but they can't even find our bodies nor our minds, nor our
spirits)

We can fly away you know
but we don't have to go
(turn invisible and smile into each others
glowing eyes)
we don't need to hide
we gonna ride

amazing creature
shines brighter than reality
(she is my love)

Whatever she does
whatever she feels
whatever she is
(is my love)

Don't nobody know what they
mean when they talk about love!

They mean they own it they
stole it they shot it
they hung it they bought it
they paid for it they
trapped it they cooked it
they ate it
the got if for christmas and then
re-wrapped it

Broke it smashed it

(but that ain't how I feel about her)

I let her come up as sunrise
and I let her settle in as moonlight
when I run in the forest she runs with me

when I drive to my rock n roll on the highway
she rolls with me

(when I eat my cake she eats it with me)

and I like her just a little bit more
(than anything)

I tattooed their names
somewhere

every-good outlaw knows that
his pistons are the crossbones of a skull that
may or may not be his own

(death is always the lover)
flowers of many colors

and they were his beatific dyad
a rapturous binary
star system...

BAD POEM ABOUT THE TRUTH

Had to take my poems underground
(maybe I'll go down to Galveston)
cause I heard it in that old radio-song

Build that old chopper I'm always talkin bout
(should I pull the trigger
make that really hard move
break down the walls she thinks she has)

What does she want with my power?
(last night I could see right through her bones)
and no one knows what her soul looks like
but me

Know one but me could let her go
I just kept drivin down the road
after I dropped her off...
she stood like something more haunting than any
spirit...

I couldn't go home
I had to keep drivin to the radio
she makes me drive to the radio
I'm gonna pave a highway that only we can drive on
make a kingdom that only we can get high on
(i know she'll find me there)
even if it takes a thousand years
(but everybody that's anybody knows there ain't no
such thing as time and any fool who could understand would know
that I have to make
her mine)

I was born to make her mine
and that puts blood in my time
and everything was born to die
and I was born to get high
born to ride and not be killed in battle
same as crazy-horse

and I am invoking the spirit of crazy horse

Lost my reason lost my rhyme
(but I feel the warrior inside)

she needs to feel my light and i need to stop anything that doesn't
make me free inside

the nothingness can only take you so far
and the earthly pleasures
and the gods
and the frail avatars

She speaks to me as if
(as if she came from heaven)
and the time shifts around us

(and we know that we fly high above
the others)

She seems to have some kind of eagles wings
and she moves so fast
that it appears we are in stillness

and in this stillness we are laughing
high on the speed of flight and the exhilaration
of our hyper-union

Hyper-union, star explosion
(light implosion)

Light cannot escape her beauty
(strong enough to birth a planet
stop a sky)

This sky-stopping beauty knows
I know her

(she is the only one who knows me)

I didn't think they made roses like her anymore
(now I understand
Helen, and all the other
Mythologies)

Why these gods were created to destroy each other
how a man would eat anything that Eve handed him
be it good or evil

(I like the knowledge and I
Love the snake
with its shifting powers)

My heaven is so close
(if she thinks or speaks of me)
whispers, comes near or
dreams of me

we touch briefly
(electric, quantum leap)
a briefness stretching out infinitely

(we travel time and move planets)
speak softly
change the time around
us

I tell the angels to sleep with her
(and she sends her angels to dream with me)

She makes my time sweet
(knows my poems are about her)

so beautiful she
stopped all my poetry
(healed my pain, my sorrow
my fear)

to understand the mysteries
(when we are near to each other)
darkness becomes ambient
(the ambient darkness of the constellation we
form pervades my mind)

Filled with the ambient light of illumation that fills my
heart when we are near in the convex glow
of forest darkness

(I am stretching these moments thin enough to encircle the globe)
like a filament of gold flattened to the thickness of a molecule or two
which forms a sheet,
spanning several lifetimes
wrap me in this thin gold blanket
of our lifetimes
let this be our home
(i was forced to construct this world of
ours out of the most beautiful/sacred things
i could scavenge off this world)

So we decided to put the trip down
the medieval crap and
the new-age shamanism
was all a wash

(we ate some kinda magic fruit
and became birds or something
quicksodic)

A woman's quiet acceptance
(the way she loves children and the
innocent and the broken)

Must have something to do with the way clouds
open and grass grows

(and I don't really mean anything or know what I'm talking
about or even understand my own dreams)

I'm just looking for an excuse to tell you about
my love

The entire sky of what
I feel for her is bigger than
the real sky

(she knows these mountains of who I
am will always be there to shelter
her children and her
body and her
dreams)

No fire
no rain
can touch
this place

(she knows
and she sees
and she reads my
eyes/mind
soul-whispers)

Funny how it was raining that day
when all I saw was sunlight
with you in the room

...to the time I imagined myself
without fear,
running through the back trails...
a pure soldier of God...

(this time I was only a soldier,
infused with light)

No fear
no pain

a good soldier knows when to fight
when to hide
when to kill
when to survive
when to die

(when to rise)

Some of these visions.
Or better to say,
"all of these visions that she's haunting
in my mind"

Which is to say every thought in my dust strewn
head
(those times we were:
gone
and the times we should have died,
and I shot my soul around the planet,
shot my head full a smoke and lights)

We search for perfect mirrors and I know
there is something perfectly perfect about her
something essentially
perfect

I musta been somebody else
before these times
came along
through invisible
illumination
(her face dreams of me constantly)


So many spaces inside of my time
reverberate with the moments of our
aliveness

(moments of darkness stretched paper-thin)
moments of light encompassing
everything

Our time is movin on
she sure was a dreamer
(and I like that)
Barely walked the earth
(enough pain to make her human as hell)
still can't convince myself though,
that she ain't
some kinda angel

No she ain't some kinda
angel
(some kinda angel)

I'ma' come get you wunna these days
ride you around the world a time or two

(I know about the prophecies
I know about the machines)

staggering into the future
blurring lines

We might become cloud-like incarnations
of poems

(dark silent night-trees from dreams)

Image of the proximity of
our souls
in forest darkness

(I write poetry to be
near you)

Surrounded by darkness
(we envelop each other)

or so we thought
after the mystic visions
ripped apart with sweet flesh
drinking the blood of our spirits like
tainted wine
it became so unclear
beneath the muddy waters of
what we once loved endlessly


(these times repeat themselves so often)
we have never heard of them

Most of the travelers have forgotten their
destination
and origin

be at home inside of
mine

I love you like magic
like stars
like nighttime

(some of my power)

escaped some future nighttime in your arms

where we moved like ocean waves

who could forget the times

the masters must have lied

for they could never know

the glow of your aliveness

I love you more
than the sun

& the same as
the moon

I live inside a world
of poetry and
(I am strong!)

And I remember every angel I have
seen along the many, many miles I
have come

And I have seen men broken and bewildered
huddled by the side of dirt roads, and these
children, these souls were
sent by god to show me
how the buddhas live

And I have been taken by spectres of light
deep into magical forests
(lain in the arms of a paradise so
complete it is always with me)

Observance of the hero
creates a mystical union
allowing the witness to participate
in the victory
of the champion

I Love her more than the machines
I love her more than the people
I l0ve her more than the planet

She skied me in a time
of unknown quantity

(realeased me into a river of
something outside of
known reality)

It's about power and sadness and
(sacred softness)

(yes we are ancestors of the cave
shamans)

Revel in the primal cravings
blood-lust
moon-hunger
star-mystification

She meets me in a space
(inside of dawn
somewhere other than the nighttime)

it is during the nighttime but much more
like it's own
time (lightning in a
can)

We open it carefully,
tenderly,
the way one throws stones at the moon

Holding me as if I were a stone that could be thrown
right through the moon
(I skip along the sky as if it were
water)

I don't know what it is that
stops me from writing poetry

(only that something soft and
only about her makes me
know I won't have to let her
go)

Mystified with sleep we
ramble through these times
alive enough to know
about visions & afterlife

(starving and desolate we
remain)
Outlaws of our own cause
destined to destroy every fragment
of humanity

(when the machines took over
I sat staring at the sky and the last
nighttime washed over me without
a trace of sadness)

She gave me a look that could
shatter souls and whispered
that it was for me she survived

almost missed her in the midst
of superfluous technological overflow
(she's got the old school vibe with the new school
high)

Into the newer places
(unknown spaces we are always on the brink
of)
All of us
(travellers on the edge of a time
on the edge of a space we know nothing about)
Stranded in space time
wrangling our way back to nowhere

...and I love everything around you and I love,
whatever you love

...and I spread the wealth of my spirit like a moving
shifting, growing, and contracting blanket all around me
(around the earth and the road and the cars and the friends
and the strangers, and those that would kill me and those I would kill, and those
that refuse to do nothing but love me)

and all the tyrants, and all the emperors, and all the gods
and the crazy burned out buddahs
(I raise my cup to each and every one,
I spread my blanket beneath your feet